"I don't wanna be defeated, I don't wanna be defeated. I don't wanna be defeated, I don't wanna be defeated!"
Fugazi - Bed For Scraping
:: Pics ::
Sometimes I'll feel inclined to draw or paint something. Not having a ready supply of sketching paper or paint/brushes, I just use Photoshop. I like to think that I'm pretty good with it. I guess you'll be the judge of that, though. I usually use a 1024x768 canvas, so a lot of these make good wallpapers. If you wanna use one for your own usage, go right on ahead. In fact, I don't really care what you do with these things as long as I get the credit for them in the long run. So...here they are (click the previews to view the pictures):

:: Despair Unvisited ::
I tried to keep some form with this one. After battling out some thoughts in my head, I grabbed a couple of images from google and got to work. Not entirely how I had envisioned it. Couldn't find a good picture of a weeping willow like a wanted to...or a decent pic of a straight jacket (most search results were sunglasses (??) ). Actually, the only real thing this has in common with my original idea is the delete key. Oh well. Not much was done, actually. Only a few filters and opacity changes. A little fancy selection made to make the willow blend in better. The words in the lower right are just the end of a longer piece I typed down to get out of my head. Meh.

:: The Depreciated Party ::
Well, this one is partly inspired by a dream. In this dream, there was this one guy who kept saying "something something the depreciated party." 'something something' was actually something...coherant. He said it a few times in a row after a small speech he had. It was like his closing remark or something...but that's all I can remember. Anyway, the picture itself started as two pictures, one for 'victory' and one for 'defeat'. Have fun picking which is which. Also, I'm trying to not distort the living crap out of my base images. This makes things a bit harder for me, since I'm still sorta new at it. Meh.

:: ppbskm2 ::
Yet another image I let sit around too long. This was a collection of images thrown about in a sort of boot-leg collage. I then did the usual filter, filter, filter, and filter again thing. I forget what I did after I flattened it. I know something looked bad, so I threw a lense-flare on top of it. I think it turned out rather well.

:: ponpflspokm ::
I won't get into the details of the base picture for this one. In fact, I won't give any details. Feel free to guess, though.

My basic plan was to totally distort the original image. I did that, and it looked alright, but the image was too small, so I doubled the canvas size, duplicated the layer, and stretched out the bottom layer to fill the whole canvas. It looked pretty good then, as well. I think I ended up deleting some sections of the top layer to let the bottom show through. Looks like I ran a Xenofex plugin, probably the shakey TV one. Hrm...I should really write these things up right after making them. Meh.

:: whispmaja ::
Upon acquiring the Earphoria re-release cd, I browsed the booklet and noticed a picture of James in his spaceman suit. I know have a video of a performance with him in the spaceman costume...it's going to drive me mad trying to think of it. Anyway, I was getting ready to start working on the new (v2) design, so I had to close up the link to the old site. The way things were arranged were weird, but it worked out. Instead of clicking on the button and going to the old site, it would just go to this picture. So, I figured I'd get a picture of spaceman James and photoshop it a bit and make it link to that instead. Scouring Infinite Pictures proved innefective, as they didn't have a picture of it. Instead, I grabbed a picture of the band and worked with that.

I forget most of the details, but the main thing that I was messing with was shifting over individual color channels with different plugins on each one.

:: interesting ::
After watching a segment on TechTV, I realized that I hadn't messed around with the RGB channels before. So I messed with that. I was origionally going to make a pic for the EyeFood, but I ended up making a rather interesting piece, so I'm putting it here instead. I started by getting a pic from google image search (search for 'interesting', try and find the origional...). I messed around with the RGB channel by running a different filter on each one. I did some other stuff to the overall picture afterwards. I went back to edit the channels again, and the red channel looked really really cool on it's own, so i just copied that into a new document and used it...hence the black and white. I think it looks cool, anyway.

:: gga ::
This is my first grayscale picture to be posted here. I was listening to GoodGodsAmry and decided to just make a picture to pass the time (until 'Home Movies' came on). This is the result. I started with some brail text as the background. Next, I made a checkerboard-esque selection and did a sort of stencil thing with a black and a white brush. I proceeded to use all sorts of filters and stuff (basically: duplicate layer, use a filter, edit opacity, merge down, repeat). It didn't look just quite right, so I messed with the contrast of the upper layer and it made things a lot whiter and seemed to make it all look right. This one seems to make a good wallpaper, too.

:: grafitti pics ::
Mike, web-overlord of the now defunkt Sketchbook, wanted a page where people could post a message. He called it a grafitti board. The grafitti page, named ??? for lack of a better name, originally had just the graf pic up top. Mike got bored of the look after a while, and we made a bunch of gifs and put them into a rotation at the top of the page. Some how stuff got screwed up and I lost the new page and had to revert to the old one. "Meh". All five of these take some kind of clipart (gracefully yoinked off of Art Today) and throw a bunch of random stuff at them. The overall oddness of the pics (and the pics that Mike made..not shown here...) sorta set the mood of the ??? page. I guess you had to be there to really know about it though.

:: hold door ::
This picture is something I made after watching the Adore documentary. In describing something or other (i haven't seen it in a while) Billy says, "we talk about how we love each other but, you know, we won't hold the door for somebody." I thought that was a pretty powerful quote...I still do, actually. I felt inspired to draw something from it, but I kinda lost inspiration half-way through. I've never really liked this picture and it certainly doesn't do the quote justice. I'll do it again someday. Maybe...

:: liquid digital ::
As you should know by now, I get bored very often. This picture was made because I was bored. Most of the times when I make a picture out of boredom, there's no real direction. This is one of those occasions. I don't really remember making this one. I remember getting pissed off because one of the plug-ins was adding those wavy lines on the left and right sides. Other than that, though, I'm not too sure. Looks like I used ec4000's TV plugin as one of the finishing touches. Hrm...

:: make it stop ::
This is the first 1024 pic that I made. I forget what I was going for...or if I was just bored. I believe I had just figured out about the 1x line marqee tool and was making lines and stuff. I obviously used the twirl tool. By the looks of it, I did some pretty fancy tricks with the layers...I can count at least 4. I really don't know how I gave it that faded look. I wish I knew 'cause I'd use it more often. Oh well.

:: more ::
I made this one after seeing the video for Kenna's Hellbent (which is actually a short film entitled More by some guy who's name eludes me...). This may have been some kind of experiment with masks, but I'm not too sure. It definately had a layer with holes in it and I applied an effect (the blue stuff) on the lower level. I'm not too sure how I got the holes shaped like they are...possibly the grow feature.

:: Go ::
This little one started as an experiment in custom brushes. I made a brush of some text saying 'GO!'. Hence the title. I really have no idea how I did the rest. It looks like a KPT5 plugin, but I don't have that installed anymore. The words are just a haiku I made up on the spot. It's meant to be read like 'Fitter Happier' by Radiohead, but you can read it however you want. I can't stop you...or can I...no, no I can't...

:: Eye1 ::
I'm not sure what my original vision for this pictures was (if i even had one). I think I just wanted to make a dark image with a bright sun-like thing in the corner. This is the first time I used the waterpaper filter. It gives it that whole rough tarp look around the edges. I decided on the name eye because I ended up searching for a picture of someone's eye (it was some asian guy, i think) and pasting it behind the sun, thus making it into a really bright eye/sun thingy. I put the opacity of it really low and I think I put something over it, but you can still kinda see it if you squint the right way.